Dear Reader,
2017 was a very challenging year for Steve. As I think back over the last 2 years trying to remember what happened and when, I can't even recall the names of the drugs used on the last clinical trial. I believe it was back in June 2017, he started the new treatment. Immediately he encountered issues due to some underlying heart problems we didn't know anything about. One problem led to another, and another. His energy level decreased, his pain increased and his overall well being declined. But Steve continued to get up every day, and get the most out of life that he could.
It wasn't Myeloma that ended his life, but it was a contributing factor due to the many years of treatments that compromised his immune system. One day in October, Steve was bitten by a mosquito. In insignificant moment that had deadly consequences. This mosquito was a carrier for the West Nile Virus, which invaded his nervous system, causing full body paralysis. Steve died of respiratory failure. In all the years of dealing with cancer, we knew the risks of catching colds, flus, pneumonia, infections...but not WNV.
He died in November, one month before his 72nd birthday. I miss him so much. As I have endeavored to accept my new life without him, I have learned to understand that the Lord's ways are not my ways. But grieving is hard. Uncertainty, loneliness and sadness are my constant companions. All three are hard to endure. I lean on God for everything, knowing he is my ever-present help.
This blog represents the trials and the joys of living. Live life to the fullest. Don't assume tomorrow belongs to you or your loved ones. Make sure you have settled your estate and have a will. Let your family know if you want to be buried or cremated. Don't avoid the hard conversations. They are necessary. Forgive, love and enjoy your life. Trust God in all things and prayerfully I will see you in heaven with our Lord and those who have gone before us, like Steve.
Mrs. L
